Dr. Kweethai,
Family is really important to me, but to the rest of the world business ethics keep the world “moving” in a positive direction. How can I manage a healthy relationship with my family and still be the best I can be in my work? This may sound childish, but I don’t want to make mistakes as a parent or wife. From my point-of-view I am doing well so far. What suggestions do you have to help me integrate my spiritual and business sides? As a Christian woman I want to make God, my family, and my boss happy all at the same time. Maybe I shouldn’t concentrate so much on work.
Family Important
Dear Family Important,
It is right to place God, family and boss as the priorities in your life, but I suggest you insert yourself between God and family. If you do not take care of yourself first, there is little you
can give your family that remains true and honest.
You probably use at least 2 hours a day for basic personal hygiene and travel to and from work. Add a typical 8-hour workday and you have 14 hours remaining for God, self, spouse and children.
Allocating 40% of your 24-hour day to work leaves 60%; which may sound good, but you spend nearly half of that unconscious, assuming you are getting the 8 hours of sleep necessary to adequately rest your mind and body.
Of the remaining 360 minutes of discretionary time, how much do you dedicate to prayer or communion with God; how much taking care of yourself (quiet time alone); how much in quality time with your children; and what does that leave for your husband?
Those are key questions you probably anticipated. But for a TRUE accounting, be aware of how much time you really work; i.e., time at home working on the computer or on the phone with clients or the boss. Then add cooking, cleaning, etc. Suddenly, the time you spend with family is no longer proportional. If you spend more time “providing for” your family than spending time with them, you are out of balance.
The solution is to rededicate yourself to the priorities you truly care about. Then make your efforts match your intentions. Less concentration on work may mean less income, but more time; and isn’t that what your family really needs! To find peace and happiness, keep your intentions in the right place and make your efforts match.
Dr. Kweethai
